I Love My Family - YUMMommy

I Love My Family

Well, I'm back from another mini-vacay.  It's not that I didn't want to blog, but just that I've been so moody lately it's been hard to get my thoughts together.  Yes, the mood swings and emotional rollercoaster have already started.  However, after a week's stay with my lovely mommy, I am sane again.  My mom knows me like the back of her hand almost.  So, it only made sense that she would know I was struggling with all the changes regarding my pregnancy.

Since, finding out I was pregnant, I have been struggling a little bit coming to terms with the fact that I'm having a second baby already.  And the constant morning sickness is not helping.  At times, I feel so helpless over all the changes that are going on inside my body.  I just wish I had some say over it.  A control freak, I know.  However, sitting and talking with my mom helped me to put things into perspective.

This baby is a blessing.  Although, this pregnancy wasn't suppose to go down for another two years (maybe three)  it's happening now and I need to appreciate the fact that I can produce life.  There are so many women out there who can't have kids and here I am pouting because the time isn't right.  Newsflash, there is no right timing unless you're rich and even then the timing may not be right.  God would not have given me this responsibility if He knew I couldn't handle it.

I am a great mommy to Moo.  So, why am I worried about what kind of mommy I will be to this baby?  I have no doubt that I will love both my kids equally no matter what.  Getting out the house will require more time and planning once the new baby is here, but I'm up for the challenge.  I can accept that responsibility.  I'm determine that having two young kids isn't a death sentence like a few people have tried to make it seem.

I've already started hearing "Girl, you're really going to be tied down now" and "What you going to do with two kids?"  What the hell you think I'm going to do with two kids?  I'm going to continue living my life and pursuing my goals and dreams.  It'll take some planning and a lot of help outside of me and my husband, but I can do anything that anybody else without kids can do. This is not the end of my life but the beginning of a new and more adventurous chapter.

My mom also helped me come to terms with the fact that I am not my baby bump.  "You're not wearing that are you?," she asked me on my third day at home.  Honestly, I had given up on trying to look fashionable and had just focused on comfort.  I'm two months and two weeks but I look like I'm five or six months already thanks to my tumor that grows as the baby grows.  And maternity pants don't exactly look flattering on me.  So, I'd rather wear regular jeans two sizes bigger and put on a belt to hold them up.

However, as my mom pointed out they're not exactly figure flattering either.  I end up with extra material in the crouch and butt area.  Not sexy at all.  "You're a fashion major," she reminded me as she opened up her closet.  Yes, my mom was getting ready to dress me like I was five years old again.  After a few changes, some added bling and new shoes, I looked and felt like a new woman.  I didn't feel pregnant and that was great.

"You wear the pregnancy, not the pregnancy wearing you," my mom told me as I checked out my final outfit in the mirror.  She's right.  As soon as my baby bump started showing, I started dressing down.  And that's just not me.  I'm the woman who owes hardly any flats and was wearing four inch heels to my baby shower at 8 months and wearing them well I must say.  The only time I will ever refer to myself as a girly girl is when it comes to my fashion. 

I'm all about heels with cute patterns and textures, dresses and jeans that fit my curves right and brightly colored tops.  Let's not start on my handbag collection.  LOL.  Well, it's the same way with this new body that I have.  I have to take the time to find clothes that still represent who I am, but compliment and showcase my growing belly.  So, Sunday my baby sister gave me one of her knit baby doll dresses to wear and it looked great.

I loved that it hugged my little big belly snugly but wasn't tight.  A pair of thick brown tights and studded brown flats completed my look.  It was perfcet pregnant fashionista church wear.  I could tell that people weren't just checking out my belly but my dress as well.  I got several 'oh that dress looks cute on you' looks and it made me glow.  When we went to visit my aunts afterwards they even noticed how nice I looked in the dress.

And although, I wish I could just build up a collection of cute knit dresses to wear my remaining 6 and a half months, I'm excited about going shopping for some maternity pants with my mom on Black Friday.  I heard that the Belk near my hometown has some great maternity wear on sale and will be even more discounted for Black Friday.  So, while everybody else is fighting over computers and tvs we'll be shopping peacefully in the maternity section.

I'm just thankful to have a wonderful family who is taking the time to build me up during this emotional and shakey time in my life.  Their small tasks and acts of love and sincere compassion just reminds of why I love them and miss them.  I love my family even though we don't always agree.  I wouldn't trade them for the world (some of my cousins I might) and I'm looking forwards to heading back down for Thanksgiving to enjoy more time with them.

6 comments

  1. You make such good points that I hope you hold onto:

    "God would not have given me this responsibility if He knew I couldn't handle it."
    "I can do anything that anybody else without kids can do. This is not the end of my life but the beginning of a new and more adventurous chapter."

    And I also agree that there is no right time to have a child, even though some people think that there is. Even with money and tangible items giving birth to a child is something that everyone I know who has children was not prepared for.

    You are very very lucky to have such a supportive caring family by your side to lean on and to be supported by. I'm sure it is helping you cope with all the new changes that have happened and will happen in your life.

    And I'm glad that you had your Mom there to help feel like you again. Especially because you have been dealing with crazy morning sickness I'm sure looking cute was not on the top of your priority list. But I know, like you know, an outfit that fits you, that you look good in can transform you! So go head girl!!

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  2. I remember going through some of those same anxieties before our second baby arrived. And, also like yourself, we planned on having a second baby "one day".... but not at that very moment. So it was very scary and I definitely felt really conflicted at times.

    You are right though, when you tell folks (and yourself) that having two babies won't stop you from pursuing your goals and dreams. It really won't!!!!

    So glad you have your mom with you during this emotional time. **hugs**

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  3. @MommyGlow-Yes, I am blessed to have such a supportive family especially my mom. If I didn't live so close to home, I'm sure I'd be losing my mind right about now.

    @Yakini-Thanks for the hugs. It's nice to have new friends who have been thru and are going thru what I'm experiencing at this point in my life.

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  4. This is great! I'm so glad you are feeling better about things...and yes, this baby is a blessing! And girl, if there is anytime to look your cutest it's while you're pregnant! I think there's nothing more beautiful than a pregnant woman who is still strutting her stuff and not letting that "bump" slow her down! Lol! But seriously, I can tell from reading your blog posts that you are a great mom to Moo, so like you said, I know you will be a great mom to this baby too. And while, I don't have kids, my big sister dealt with the same thing that you are so I feel a little close to your situation. Only, she had two babies back to back, (they are 10 mos apart) and the second one was quite a surprise! She was so devastated that she didn't even tell anyone until she was almost 7 mos! Not to mention she's a single mom. At the time she didn't know what she was going to do with two babies, but she survived and now none of us can imagine our lives without both of my nieces! I know once the baby comes, you will feel the exact same way!

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  5. I am glad you are thinking about the positive side of your pregnancy.

    God knows the best and he is the giver.

    I like your fashion sense even when preggo :).

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  6. @Andrea-Thanks!! Your sister is a strong woman. Having two kids close in age is not small task and with her being a single mom, I know that she has her hands full. Still, I know she wouldn't trade them for the world!

    @MsBabyPlan-You are so right. God does know best. I'm very thankful for this blessing He has bestowed upon my family and I. Still keeping you and your hubby in prayer as you two prepare for your move and continue on your TTC journey.

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